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I saw a friend a few weeks ago who said he was looking for love, commitment and a “monogamish” relationship with a woman.“Do you need to clear your throat? Today, the idea is becoming even more mainstream as we delay marriage and design our lives according to our needs, wants and values—not just the expectations we follow based on what society or our parents would think. D., who has worked with monogamish couples in his private practice in New York City. Savage asserted that these kind of relationships are happening more and more with straight couples across the country, though many will never talk openly about it. More specifically: good in bed, giving equal time and equal pleasure, and game for anything—within reason.The term was coined by Dan Savage, gay author and sex advice columnist for the Stranger.Considering the age difference here, and considering that this is a post-divorce rebound relationship for you both, the odds are stacked against anything long-term. What I mean is this: You’ll probably be together for another year or two before parting ways.

The healthiest loners shrug it off and don't search for mates, the complicit loners play along and go through the motions of searching for mates, and the oblivious loners make themselves and others miserable by searching for and landing mates they never wanted.I want to do other things, but she doesn’t want to do anything anymore other than missionary-position sex.Anal, oral, watching porn together, bondage, voyeurism—she’s not up for any of it.He was sneaky—he didn’t reveal he was in an open relationship until the second date, but by then I was infatuated and felt like I wasn’t in control of my actions.So what I’ve learned is that poly couples often seek out others to create NRE or “new relationship energy,” which may help save their relationship in the long run. What about the people who are dragged into a situation by some charmer in an attempt to breathe new life into a stale relationship?

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I’ve read your column for as long as I had access to the internet and was interested in sex, so here goes: I’m a 27-year-old male with a 42-year-old girlfriend. We’ve been together for a year, and the sex is still the best I’ve ever had—she says she feels the same—but it’s vanilla.

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